I’m back!  And boy, I missed blogging and reading blogs soo much.  I thought I could survive with only my phone for Web access, but I was wrong.  The laptop will never leave me again!  Thanks for being patient with me being M.I.A. for 10 days.  Reception wasn’t great in the desert, even when I was able to check my email.

Warning:  Loooong and semi-personal post ahead (in 2 parts … I broke it up with a couple photos for you, LOL).  But I wanted to write it for myself, and it’s my blog, so I did :)

So … when I was just starting out in this industry (like, still had a fulltime other job, no business cards, no website or anything), I went to a networking event for all kinds of wedding vendors.  And let me tell you, it was torture for me!  It just was not my style, but I still thought that I should be there.  I felt a giant cloud of inauthenticity hanging in the air … most people only wanted to meet you if you could somehow help them get booked or send them referrals.  And when they met you … it amounted to a 3 minute awkward and artificial information exchange and the swapping of business cards (which I didn’t have).  Every vein in my body wanted to head for the hills (of course, I couldn’t really do that without looking insane)!  I never heard from any of those people again.

Since then, I have made it a point to authentically invest in the relationships I have with other wedding vendors and photographers by only telling them things that are for real … giving them compliments that come only from the heart (through the blogosphere, Twitter, Facebook or in-person) — whether local or far away … whether they’ll send me referrals or not.  I don’t care if they’re a “big shot” — I’ve never felt good about schmoozing anyone.  I just want to meet people who seem themselves, who seem real.  And it’ll probably take more than 3 minutes for me to know this.  I’ve also since made it a point to attend intimate workshops rather than networking events or bridal shows.  At workshops I’ve met photographers at all stages of the game, and I’ve really gotten to know them personally (because workshops are cool in a cool summer camp kind of way).  Yes, they are an investment in time and money for sure.  But I haven’t made a better investment since starting my business.  The workshop friendships I have made are the opposite of superficial.  Have I gotten referrals from these photographers?  Yes — but it’s not because I pretended to be someone else and it’s not because I impressed them with my 3 minute businessy pitch.

This is only my blog and my personal take on things.  I think bridal shows and networking events can work for some people (and that some people thrive on them, actually), just as I know everyone has different personalities and social styles.  I’m not dissing these things, I am simply saying that they don’t fit with my personality … and that taking part in them would only be a disservice to the person I am and to my business.  It’s important to me that I remain loyal to myself while chasing my dream … and attending industry events because it looks good and I might make important connections is not my personal style. I would end up hating photography quickly, if I continued to do things like that.  I’ve been incredibly fortunate to get referrals from photographers that I greatly admire … photographers from whom I never dreamed of getting referrals.  And these referrals happened, I hope, from getting to know those photographers a bit while continuing to focus on my art … and not by schmoozing them or sending them a stack of my business cards (can I just say that I hate the sound and look of the word schmooze, but I can’t think of anything more fitting?!).

Now, I knew that my personality was anti-networking-style going into WPPI (a HUGE wedding and portrait photographers conference).  I also knew that I would know about 3 people … since most of my photo friends could not attend this year.  But I ALSO knew that I couldn’t miss the opportunity to hear some amazing speakers and be in warmer weather.  So I went.  And did I like it?  Totally.  Do I still like workshops better?  Absolutely!!  WPPI was great and I had an awesome time reconnecting with (the few) photographers I knew, as well as meeting those with whom I have blogging/Twitter/Facebook relationships.  That was very rad.  But I didn’t walk away with a stack of business cards or a bunch of new friends.  That wasn’t my intention.  I might feel cooler if I had met a bunch of people to name drop right now — but it also wouldn’t be real.  I simply want to know people … I want to have real connections and real community … even if it’s online.  Do I think WPPI will get better year after year?  Definitely.  I’ll know more people with each passing year, and WPPI will always be an awesome time for us all to gather together and chill/party.  Am I open to meeting new people and making new friends at WPPI?  Of course!  But it’s just not my nature to be the person approaching someone else or the person passing out business cards like they’re free :)  I’m not going to attend WPPI each year in order to mulitply my friend count … I’ll go to connect, to learn, to be myself with other people being themselves.

Speaking of partying, the Airhorns and Lasers party was how I kicked-off WPPI, with my friend Kristine.  It was pretty much a blast.  This is what it looked like:

As for the speakers (yes, the speakers were my favorite part of WPPI, which goes to show that I’d rather read a book in my room than go to a party alone and be forced to introduce myself to strangers all night) … the highlights for me included Jesh de Rox, Jasmine Star and Elizabeth Messina … who all spoke about authenticity in your work and in your business.  I already talked a lot about authenticity in this post … but I can’t emphasize its importance enough.  Being completely me since beginning this journey has made all the difference in any bit of success I have had.  As soon as I try to mimmick another photographer’s photos, branding, blogging style, SEO and marketing approach, networking style, etc … I fail; I’m not as happy.  And I always want to be happy in this career.  Because right now I am sooo in love with photography and the awesome people I have met since starting out.  It sounds cliche, but it’s the truth and I never want that to change.  I know that a lot of people are marketing and networking on a much grander and more professional scale than I am, but I love the clients I attract through word-of-mouth and I love the photographers I have gotten to know on a deeper level than business cards and a what-can-you-do-for-me exchange.

I love that every relationship I now have in this industry, big or small, is authentic.  Recently I’ve gotten a few emails asking how I got published and booked the weddings I did when I did.  And I’m not sure … but I know that since I left that first networking event, I have focused on doing only what I love and trusting that people who love what I do will find me (whether that’s other photographers, art directors, or brides and grooms).  Life is too short not to love what you’re doing.  I booked-out all of 2010 without paying for advertising, attending events that I should be attending, straying from the style of photography that makes me happy, or schmoozing with other photographers in order to get referrals.  BTW — nothing against advertising — especially if it’s bringing in the clients that you want and love — but it’s not me.

Edited to insert this paragraph: Is it always easy to be this way?  Not at all.  I still feel like I should be attending certain events, entering certain awards competitions, making certain connections, and be a part of certain groups.  Sometimes I wonder if I’m making the right decisions when I don’t go to networking events or I don’t advertise in the hugest wedding guide in the area.  But then I think about how out-of-character I would be doing these things, and I know my answer.  Like I said, I didn’t mean to write this post as if it’s easy.  But I do think it’s easier to be yourself through and through, than to pitch yourself as somebody you’re not and then have to live up to it later.

It’s so easy to be yourself.  It’s natural and you won’t have to try as hard.

Work hard at your art and what you love?  Yes, of course.  But try so hard in a manner that’s not fitting/not right and causes you to hate what was once your dream?  I hope not.  Not ever.

Below are a few more photos from my time in Vegas for WPPI.  All taken with my point and shoot camera, so excuse the quality.  Next up is a post on the rest of my trip in the southwest.  Thanks for reading, friends!

View outside and inside the MGM Grand (our hotel was bigger than any I have ever seen.  My hometown could fit inside!):

Yes, there were even REAL lions inside our hotel (not sure if I thought this was cool or insane or just wrong):

Kristine was such an awesome WPPI buddy for the first couple days.  Once she left, WPPI wasn’t as fun:

Walked down the Strip a couple times, even.  Troy with the Eiffel Tower:

And lastly, a slide from Jesh’s presentation (which was blow-my-mind powerful):